For a day or two I was thinking I was going to hate my job from this point forward, but I have since had time to ponder life’s circumstances through less emotional eyes.
I like my job. I know the grass is not greener on the other side; I know, because I have interviewed everywhere and no clinic is perfect. I have only a ten minute commute to work. I am reimbursed well for my services. I have flexible hours. Besides, I still feel like I owe her something.
When I was first starting out at the clinic, she helped me out when she did not have to. I cost her a considerable sum of money, but she had faith in me. For her act of generosity, I will forever be thankful.
Now, as I think about it, I realize that I just need time. She does not read as much as I do, so she is unaware of some of the advancements in neuroscience over the last 10-20 years and she is only trying to protect her reputation and her practice. My emerging emphasis on brain science is just a very foreign concept to her now, but in time, I will help her understand where I am coming from. I can demonstrate how I can treat patients with an intellectually honest and scientifically defensible rationale, regaining her respect.
I am glad that I did not say something in haste before giving it more thought. I would have regretted it.